i feel like the only motivation i have is my family. Everything i do is for them to have it better. a better tomorrow, a better week, a better year, any little thing i can do to make it better for them i will do. undoubtedly though if i fail to make things better i will fall back on counting the blessings. i feel like there must be some balance between being content with what you have and striving to be better. i think i am almost completely at the content end of the spectrum. i need more strive in my life. i don't really strive to do anything for myself, except my physical fitness i guess.
is it possible for me to look around and be thankful for what i have and strive for more at the same time? i've never done it in my life. i have never looked around and said "this is great but it could be better if..." maybe i would try harder if i found something i was good at? does it count as striving if i am already good at it, or is that just more of being content? i know i have to motivate myself someway because someone else telling me to do something generally has the opposite effect on me. this is quite a question to ask myself tonight. something needs to change because i want better for my family, i want them to be happy. i want to be a better husband and dad.
(why don't i think i should be the best husband and dad? i mean really? that's what comes to my mind. i want to be better. that's what i wrote and then i thought why don't i want to be the best? i don't think i can be the best so i won't even make that my goal. i've never been #1 at anything in my life so why would i expect to start being #1 at anything now. i really can't think of one thing i've ever won. i am a loser. how can i think my life is great and think i'm a loser in the same breath)
i am a strange person.
now, i don't want anyone to get the wrong impression and think that i am sitting around feeling sorry for myself tonight. that is certainly not the point. i don't feel sorry for myself one bit.(i'm an optimist after all, or a settler) i love my wife, my son and the rest of my family very much and that is what makes my life happy. not jobs or possessions or winning. if they are happy then i am happy.
p.s. my apologies if that makes no sense at all but it was written more for my benefit than anything else. after all, it is my blog.
10 comments:
Me too I cant think of a better B-Day present then those grandbabies thanks GMB
Love you Harry you did the right all the way its there loss
You already are the best husband and dad ever and WE are lucky to have YOU. We've got everything we need. I'm the loser that always wants more, but really all I want is more time with you.
Harry, I have never met anyone like you before in my life. I think you are great. You have this way about you that makes everyone happy when they are around you. I miss you more then you will ever know. I am lucky to have you as my brother (In-Law). I couldn't have asked for a better one. Give the wife and the little man a hug and kiss for me. Smile.
harry you have a loving wife and a shiney new baby boy, i don't know anyone who would not be content with that. i do know people that have that as their only goal. everyone has questions, i think if you didn't ask yourself that woukd be a problem. as for being a better dad, i think that saying the best dad is a bad thing becouse that implies a stopping point once you are the best. being a better dad means that you will keep trying and working even if you are the best. you have done a lot for your family and yourself just think about where you were and what you were doing 10 years ago.
love you brother keep being content,questioning, and striving.
about the job, maybe you are not meant to do something so dangerous with your life, when you have dedicated it to your family.
God, I love that man! You have such a good brother. lol
Harry, I don't think striving to be #1 is really all that important. I think all any of us can to is to be the best person that we can be. That allows you to strive but also means you don't have to compare yourself to anyone else and then feel like you've settled.
Harry, you are WEALTHY beyond imagination. You have a beautiful, healthy, loving family - what more can you ask? There is no such thing as a "perfect" husband/father but we keep trying, don't we? I think that is really all that matters in the long run. That we keep trying. And learning. That NEVER ends. Have faith and trust in God - the rest will work out. Love, always.
Hey! Lighten Up Son! Don't let anyone or anything shake your confidence in yourself. You are a fabulous human being! In the immortal words of Scarlett O'Hara "Tomorrow is another day!"
Love you!
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